Hello WW Philadelphia Members!
There’s a fine line between advice and judgment when it comes to making changes in our lives. More than once, someone has asked me to ‘talk’ a family member into joining WeightWatchers. Every time I have declined. This is not a change that you can convince someone to do. This is a change someone makes when they are ready.
Lifetime Members in particular can be very enthusiastic about sharing their WW way of life. While all that is fine and good the ‘way’ to a healthier life for every Member is very different.
Some years back a beautiful lifetime Member asked me to convince her Mother to join. Her Mom was very overweight and was having significant mobility issues due to her obesity and was using a wheelchair to get around her home and in public. I politely declined but invited her to bring her Mom to the next meeting to visit. I encouraged her not to insist her Mom join but allow her to sit in the back (for ease of escape). If Mom wished to join, we would assist her with the process after the meeting.
The following week the Member and her Mom were sitting in the back. This was a large meeting and it was easy to feel anonymous if you wanted to be. By the end, Mom was ready to get started on a path of making her life different!
So many times in our lives we need a chance to sit in the back, listen and think about making a change. Changes come in all forms, our health, our fitness, our relationships, our beliefs, and our futures. The best part; change is good, change is exciting and change is healthy at all times of our lives. The bad part; even good changes usually come with some pain.
The Mom in this story came back for her weigh-in the following week. She was excited and apprehensive, the same feeling many of us have felt as we walked up to the scale. After standing up from her wheelchair she leaned towards me and whispered, “I cheated this week.” I said, “Okay, what happened?” She said, “I ate an extra tablespoon of raisins.” I whispered back with my best poker face, “I think it’s going to be okay.”
This beautiful Member was judging herself harshly for eating an extra tablespoon of raisins and she lost over ten pounds in her first week! She went on to lose 40% of her starting weight, no longer needed the wheelchair, and graduated from a walker to a single cane. She called me after I started working at the office and told me how she was going to take a trip to Maine to see her older brother who she never imagined seeing again in this life.
I ponder the changes both good and bad I’ve made throughout my life and treasure all of them because they make me who I am today. I certainly have been far from successful in many and very successful in others but every mistake adds character, and every victory adds strength.
Think of all the times the “extra raisins” turn into 104 extra POINTS not counted and the opportunity to move forward with our healthier weight is stolen from us by our own heavy self-judgment of the raisin consumption.
Moving forward often means taking your own advice, making your own changes, saving yourself from your own judgments, and living well for the potential future you can make for yourself and the positive influences you can inspire in your circle of friends, family, and neighbors.
This week try to reserve judgment on yourself and others, sprinkle grace on yourself and everyone around you, and advise wisely and sparingly.
Stay well,
